Anyone that has tried to live for the Lord for more than a day knows that satan will attack you every chance he gets. Although the Lord allows us to face these tests He is faithful to be there with us till the end. Each test, trying as they may be, is really there to strengthen our faith. Now I have always been a pretty good test taker. Throughout school essay tests were always my favorite. I know, I am kinda weird that way. In high school everyone else groaned when Mrs. Cooper (Sr. English) would announce that the entire final would be done in essay form. I rejoiced! In college, when I found out that every single Philosophy test would be 1 to 3 questions-all essays-I knew I had a A for the semester. Unfortunately, in our Christian walk, we are not normally given the kind of test that we always do well with. Oh no, that would be way too easy and our Christian growth would come so slowly with each effortless battle won. Instead the Lord teaches us the same way that we homeschool our own children.
If you fail the test you retake it until you finally get it right!
This is not some government run system. There is no moving on to the next level until you are really ready. There is no option for skipping ahead. Not only is skipping ahead not allowed, your test will get harder and harder until the lesson is learned through and through.
Let me tell ya, I am really wishing there was an essay test available now! You see, the tests that I am a big failure at are the financial tests and I do believe they may just be the hardest ones out there!
It all started about six years ago. We bought a house with a mortgage payment based on 2 incomes. Within months of buying our house the Lord got ahold of my heart and opened my eyes to the fact that I was not living for Him or raising my children for Him. No Problem! We started being faithful to church.
A+ Each week, it seemed, brought to light more worldly things we needed to get out of our daily life and we did that (for the most part-I am definitely not claiming to have removed every sinful thing from our home then
or now but there were some
serious changes fast!)
A- A few more months passed and the Lord showed me where He would have me to be as a mother and a wife-at home! Monty and I immediately began to make plans for that to happen. God saw our plans but implemented His own timing which sped our plans up significantly. We didn't fight it.
A It was great to be following the Lord's leadership and each step seemed to be lit with a bright flashing arrow from the Lord leading to the outcome that He desired. Just a few more months and Monty got saved. Now he was also faithfully in church with the kids and I.
A++ Another unmistakable flashing arrow appeared showing us that the Lord's plan for children was to be learning from
us at
home. You got it, Lord!
A+ Within about 18 months we went from a 2 income family trying to live the American dream with a new mortgage, a little too much credit card debt, and a car payment to a homeschooling family living on about 1/2 the income we started with and the Lord was faithful through it all. The car and the credit cards were somehow paid off even without the extra income. You would think passing several tests of faith so easily would have built my faith up enough to make it through anything but then the Lord said it is time for you to tithe faithfully and support My church. Ok, we can do that-until something unexpected comes up.
B- Whoops! That one wasn't so easy. So we try again C and again D and again F and each test gets harder and harder. I really do understand the importance of honoring God with our finances. I am sure I could write an awesome essay about just that but an essay is just not gonna cut it this time. My heart reminds me that my God is faithful but my head keeps reminding me of that mortgage(based on 2 incomes) that is passed due regardless of the fact that the truck HAD to have 2 new tires because the others had wires sticking out AND 2 new shocks to replace the broken ones that we discovered while changing the tires, AND a new battery because the old one had to be jump started every single time-all in one month. Not to mention the electric bill that should arrive any day now reflecting the charges incurred by 10 days of 100+ degree weather
already this summer and it's not even July yet! Oh, yeah-there is still the rest of next years curriculum to buy.
Now I am not telling you these things as an invitation to my own personal pity party but because I need your help!
NO! I am not asking for money!
I need something with much more value than money. Oh,
me of little faith! I need your prayers and I need them badly!!!! You see, I know how this works now. I see how much harder each test gets when you continue to fail and I am
really ready to move on. I
HAVE to pass this time and there is no
easy A coming my way. !